Wednesday, October 13, 2010

It Must Be Told


I have held this inside for too long and it has to be told. My name is Beaker and many of you know me as Dr Honeydew's hapless assistant on The Muppet Show. I am hear to tell you that Video Game Journalist "Ryan Davis", if that is even his real name (most of us in the muppet community just know him as Taswell) is not what he makes himself out to be.

He masquerades around as someone who is into dating humans, but that could not be farther from the truth. People i am here to tell you today that Ryan is a MUPPETFUCKER. As shocking as it sounds it is true. He trolls muppet forums looking for a quick fling, and on the night of September 23rd ,he accidentally tweeted that he was in a tinychat video conference room with several muppets discussing all sorts of lewd things he would do to fozzie bear if he had the chance.


There have been times when pieces of felt fell out of his bag at work and he told his co workers that he was into "Arts and Crafts". To me that is a SICK euphemism for his muppet fetish. For too many years ,my colleagues and myself have quietly tolerated this human on muppet interaction, but i just can't hold my silence anymore. The next time you read one of his reviews, just think to yourself, this guys is a Muppetfucker! I present some evidence for your review.

10 comments:

  1. This could not be more true. I know a Muppet at my work that totally has a Taswell/Fozzie Bear sex tape.

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  2. I saw the video "Two Muppets One Ryan Davis". It made me sick

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  3. I hate that muppetfucker, Ryan Davis. Him and his uh uh uh's and "swords".

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  4. Wow i used to love Ryan Davis i feel so betrayed.
    But i'm not mad just disappointed i actually feel sorry for him and his family who must be suffering the most from his addiction.

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  5. That filthy muppetfucking bastard...

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  6. i even heard a rumor about a taswell, statler and waldorf threesome

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  7. I have been working for Ryan Davis for sixteen years. All I have to say is that it is all true. All of it. Unfortunately a lot of people just do not want to face the truth about Ryan Davis.

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